Kids & Family
Bullying at school: what to do?
Bullying is repeated, intentional harm. Learn safe, practical steps for students, parents, and bystanders to stop it and get support.
Written by Grace Kim · Reviewed by Michael Osei · Updated October 31, 2026 · 3 min read
Immediate actions
- 1 Tell a trusted adult (parent, teacher, counselor) immediately; do not handle it alone.
- 2 Document incidents: dates, times, places, what happened, and who was involved.
- 3 Avoid confronting the person who is bullying; prioritize your safety.
- 4 Ask the school for their anti-bullying policy and how they will respond.
- 5 Seek emotional support from family, friends, or a counselor.
What not to do / warning
If you are in immediate danger or have thoughts of harming yourself, call your local emergency number right away.
Bullying is repeated, intentional behavior that hurts, intimidates, or excludes someone. It can be physical, verbal, social (like spreading rumors), or online. If you or someone you know is being bullied, you are not alone and it is not your fault. Taking action early can stop it and protect your well-being.
What is happening
Bullying often involves a power imbalance: the person doing it may be bigger, more popular, or hold some advantage. It can happen in person, via messages, or on social media. Recognizing it is the first step: it is not a normal part of growing up, and it should not be ignored.
What to do first
- Tell a trusted adult. Speak to a parent, caregiver, teacher, school counselor, or coach. If the first adult does not help, tell another. Keep telling until someone takes action.
- Stay safe. Avoid being alone in places where bullying happens. Sit near others, use well-lit routes, and keep your phone charged.
- Do not fight back physically. Responding with violence can escalate the situation and get you hurt or in trouble. Instead, use assertive words like "Stop" or "Leave me alone" and walk away.
- Document everything. Write down what happened, when, where, and who was involved. Save screenshots of online messages. This helps the school investigate.
- Ask the school for help. Request a meeting with a teacher or administrator. Ask about the school's anti-bullying policy and what steps they will take. Follow up in writing if needed.
If you are a parent or caregiver
Listen calmly and believe your child. Avoid blaming them or telling them to "just ignore it." Ask what they need and reassure them that you will help. Contact the school and request a written response. If the bullying involves threats, physical harm, or sexual content, report it to the police.
If you are a bystander
Do not join in or laugh. If it is safe, speak up or help the person leave the situation. Report what you saw to an adult. Supporting the person being bullied can make a big difference.
What NOT to do
- Do not confront the person bullying you alone or in anger; it can put you at risk.
- Do not delete evidence of online bullying; save it first.
- Do not keep it secret. Bullying thrives in silence.
- Do not retaliate with threats or violence.
When to seek professional help
If you feel hopeless, anxious, depressed, or have thoughts of harming yourself, tell a trusted adult and seek help from a mental health professional immediately. In the U.S., you can call or text 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. If you are in immediate danger, call your local emergency number.
How to prevent it
Schools can reduce bullying by promoting respect, supervising hotspots, and responding consistently. Students can help by including others, not sharing harmful posts, and reporting bullying. Parents can stay involved and talk openly about online safety.
Remember: bullying is not your fault, and help is available. Take the first step today by telling someone you trust.